Wearing your grief on your sleeve
By Aidan Belanger & Jordan Cleland
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Mourning jewellery is a weirdly wonderful way to honour your loved ones. A stylish, sometimes spooky, special momento to remind you of a life lost. While it may seem like a melancholic way to mourn, there’s something nice about making and owning something nice in a not so nice time. Remembrance can be celebratory, life can be celebrated in death. If fashion is a way to express ourselves, why not convey grief through what we put on our bodies? Besides, it’s trendy to wear your heart on your sleeve.
Back in the 1600s, people would honour the deceased with dark and detailed pieces boasting symbols including skeletons, skulls, crossbones and reapers. The grim jewellery of this time was designed as a reminder of death’s inevitability (and at Tilde we are here for a reminder of death’s inevitability!).
In the 1800s, Queen Victoria brought remembrance jewels back in style, softening things up with romantic imagery. She would have pieces commissioned using floral, heart, angel and cloud motifs and featuring portraits of the deceased. Memorial jewellery at the time gravitated towards black, as the colour had to be worn for the deep mourning stage, lasting two to three years. White enamel signified the death of an unmarried female virgin or a child. Turquoise details in pieces were to mean the person was in your thoughts. Wealthy families would set precious stones into their commissioned commemorative jewels.
Made in 1852, the gold ring featured above has a glass covered window at the centre exposing finely woven hair from the deceased. Black enamel covers the band with gold block letters that read IN MEMORY OF. Engraved underneath the centrepiece is the name Mary Allan. Several English hieroglyphs are are stamped inside the band itself.
This antique gold pendant is set with onyx and natural pearls. It was believed that onyx helped with emotional and physical strength in times of stress, confusion or grief, while pearls signified tears. The saltire cross is a heraldic symbol. The pendant features a photograph of the lost loved one on the reverse.
This Victorian mourning ring has six trap windows that slide open to reveal the deceased’s hair. The inside of the band is engraved with Caroline Barker, died 9th March 1885.
Modern mourning jewellery collections feature black and white enamel and common death motifs like urns, lilies, and willows. Lockets with pictures of those lost is a popular way of honouring the deceased. Engraved simplistic gold and silver pieces can be worn on a daily basis as an ever-present reminder of both life and death.
So, what do you think? Too macabre? Or the perfect way to remember?
Whether you’re mourning a pet, friend or family member, grief is part of the human experience and commemorating a loved one through jewellery gives you a way of holding their memory close.
